Friday, July 31, 2009

I won't be renewing my membership

After a full week on Weight Watchers, I have lost exactly zero pounds. Not that my weight numbers matter, you see. I am really just concerned about how I feel and how my clothes fit.

So no, no poundage lost and maybe no inches either. I've a three-month membership to Weight Watchers and that'll be enough, I think. I've got the hang of it.

The good news is that my back doesn't hurt anymore. I am breathing easier and walking more erect. So, obviously the scale is lying about something.

Also, I started fat-lady yoga with Megan Garcia's Yoga Just My Size.


Saturday, July 25, 2009

"Getting healthier" is the cover phrase but I'm really on a diet

I made it home from my trip.

I let some things get to me on the plane-both seatmates got up and moved-and I also started thinking about how my host in the city I visited kept talking about how our health (they didn't use the word "weight") needs to get in control. She was gracious enough to include herself in the factor rather than hounding solely me about it. They have a problem with my weight but apparently I have a problem with it as well. I think it's okay for ME to have a problem with it and do something about it accordingly.

So yes, I can agree with the idea of being healthier and shedding some pounds. But, at the same time I feel like such a hypocrite because I'm now on a diet and disregarding my HAES principles. I know that Weight Watchers is the Axis of Evil in the Health At Every Size movement and no matter what they call it at WW it is a diet. Even if in the back of my mind I tell myself that I am just getting control of my health, if you ignore your bodily cues and you let someone tell you what to eat, when to eat it, how to eat it, and how much of it to eat it then you are on a diet.

Maybe I am in denial? I kept telling myself that as long as my numbers are good then I am fine. But no, this is not good.

My legs ache.
My feet hurt and swell all the time.
My thighs stick together.
I have lots of backfat that annoys the hell out of me.
My posture is horrible.
It's hard to breathe.
It's becoming more and more difficult to find good-fitting clothes *and* shoes.

No, this is not good.

Maybe Weight Watchers can help.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Uppity Fat Chick gets a little un-fat

So, I plan to get a little healthier.

I still want to be a chunky monkey, but I am noticing some things about my health that could lead to more serious conditions. I had a check-up recently and all my numbers were good. However, I breathe too hard and get winded too easily when I walk. Sometimes my back hurts when I stand for a long time. This is new and I don't like it.

So from now on I will be watching my portion control more closely, listening to when I am hungry and when I am not, and getting more structured in my daily exercise routine. I'll cut out the ga-zillion Coke Zeros that I drink in a day (cringe) and replace them with water. I will not, however, be weighing myself or getting anxious about being a size-whatever.

Then, in a couple months I'll have a report. In the interim I'll make note of things that have changed. Hopefully, along with even better numbers (blood pressure, cholesterol, etc.) the backpain will be diminished and I'll be breathing easier.

Stay tuned.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Flying as a fattie on American Airlines

So, I made it to my destination.

The first leg of the trip was uneventful, except for when I realized that I was at the wrong terminal for my connecting flight. I had to get on a sky-train and go to another terminal and arrived just in time for boarding. I’d mis-read my boarding pass and thought we’d be boarding at the printed time, so I was in a hurry because I thought I was running late. Who am I to think they’d start boarding 20 minutes after the fact? Once I realized there was no need to be running through the airport, I slowed it down, got a coffee and took my time.

I have no problem with using the people mover/horizontalator thing (as opposed to “escalator”) rather than walking. But one thing I wonder is why people walk on them when the whole point of using them is so that you don’t have to walk. Then, they get mad because you’re using it the way it’s supposed to be utilized, by standing still and letting it move you. Sometimes there are stairs next to escalators, and sometimes there aren’t. In the latter case, I can see why some people would use escalators as stairs rather than standing still. But not on horizontal people movers because you have all this un-moving floor space to walk on while the people mover is, maybe, 5′ wide. Save it for those who don’t want to walk! I hate humans.

So, I board and since my companion wasn’t there another person was seated next to me. He was a man, bald, in a suit, stinking of too much cheap after-shave, and traveling with a woman and a young boy who sat in the row in front of us. He held what I assume was a laptop bag on his lap and never buckled up. Clearly he was peeved to be sitting next to Uppity Fat Chick. Whatever, though. His problem.

I ignored him until right before take-off when he moved to the row behind us, which was empty. Good, now I had a whole row to myself and a bit of relief from his overpowering cologne. I’d also slipped my seat belt extender from the first flight into my carry-on so I wouldn’t have to ask for another. I got on the plane, buckled up and ready to go in less than 5 minutes. Also, I kept my seat belt extender for use on the way back. It’s not like I’m stealing it because I’ll leave it on the last plane once I am home. I just want to keep it to speed up my boarding process.

My ride from the airport met me at baggage claim and we were out of there in 10 minutes. It was a good flight for the most part and I hope my return trip goes just as well.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Uppity Fat Chick takes a trip

I'm leaving on jetplane.

This is not my first flight since Southwest Airlines-the ring leader in instituting fat phobic policies requiring passengers of size to purchase an extra seat-offended fat people everywhere and other airlines followed with similar policies. I will be flying on American Airlines because I was unable to locate a specific policy that blatantly discriminated against fat people. If there is one such policy, I won't be surprised.

My flight leaves at 1:40 and I plan to be at the airport by 12 noon so as to make other arrangements if I should find myself the subject of discrimination. I do know that I will need a seatbelt extender, and since my travel companion will not be in the seat next to me due to an emergency situation (Court. They plan to catch a later flight.) I might have the whole row to myself.

I will blog about how it goes once I arrive at my destination.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Who is Uppity Fat Chick

I am fat.

I am not rubenesque, zaftig, voluptuous, pleasingly plump, fluffy, thick, big-boned, full-figured, or even a "BBW". I have nothing against women who use these words to describe their bodies, but I am not any of the euphemisms that many fat woman adopt to portray themselves as personable to others. I carry my weight exceptionally well but I am still fat. I believe that sugar-coating my fatness with a euphemism puts too much focus on my body. I am a woman of many talents who just happens to be fat and being fat is not all that encompasses me. The other words are crutches that I don't need.

When someone thinks they're insulting me, they don't scream, "YOU PLEASINGLY PLUMP, BITCH!" No, they call me a fat bitch.

I enjoy a multitude of activities that someone my size socially should not. I love to walk, and sometimes I even break into a jog. Swimming is a joy and I have no shame in putting on a suit to do something that pleases me. I dance-belly, and hip hop styles-and while I've matured from my club-hopping days I'll tear up a dance floor at any given chance. My size has nothing to do with my activity level.

So why should it matter to anyone else? The fact is that it does. Society and the medical world has erroneously burned into most people's minds that fat people are not acceptable, that we are the image of laziness and sloth, undeserving of full and happy lives. It's society's double-standard: fat people have no right swimming, dancing or partaking in activities that require confidence and promote health, nor do we have any right to be fat.

So which is it? Can our activities reflect a healthy lifestyle without our bodies being a factor? Of course it can, and my belief in this is what makes me uppity. How dare I believe that my large thighs and fleshy mid-section have no bearing on who I am and what I can achieve! What nerve I have to not be a fat woman who is the image of what most people think fat women should be-dumpy, sad, lonely, socially inept, or just down right pathetic.

I am Uppity Fat Chick and this is my blog. It will be a body positive, sex positive, fat friendly, feminist, diversely receptive space to air out my complaints with a fat phobic, size zero obsessed, male dominated world.